Wednesday, 26 July 2017

Just a Little Life Update

I cannot remember if I've mentioned it, but I have finally finished university! For those that don't know I have spent the last three years studying Primary Education at The University of Roehampton. I think it was the hardest part of my education I've ever done, I mean of course it would be, its a big step up from GCSEs and A-levels, but I didn't realise just the intensity it sometimes held. But it was worth it, It has shown me just how much I love working with children.

However, I haven't taken the same route as everyone else who has finished my degree. Everyone else I know are eagerly awaiting to start teaching their first ever class come September, with some who have already started. Me, I chose to take time out and wait a little longer to go into teaching fully. I am still working with children and will actually take the role as a teaching assistant come September. The reason for this is because although I enjoyed my degree and loved my placements and taking on the role as a teacher, on one placement I got mixed views from teachers. Some were making me weary of the fact that even though they loved it it was pretty much their whole life and not just a part of it. That threw me, because I have always had this idea of doing a job I love by then also having a good balance of work and personal and I was afraid that wouldn't happen. I work hard, but I also need time to completely shut off and I was finding on placements I was doing stuff every evening and nearly my entire weekend was taken up with planning and things. This wasn't the only reason but it solidified the fact I wasn't ready and still feel I have things to do with my life which don't include teaching full time.

So with being a teaching assistant I can still assist in their learning, still feel the reward of those light bulb moments and enjoy it all but come the end of the school day I get to switch off, I get to come home and focus on me and any hobbies I have and my friends and family and not feel guilty for any of it. I am worried, I'm worried I could disappoint those closest to me because they've always loved the idea that I've gone away to learn to be a teacher and now I'm hesitating. It's not to say I will never do it, because give it a year or two and that passion might come back and I might feel ready to fully dive into it or I might be taken down another path.
But for now, I still get to work with children and I still get time to continue with other things and I am very very excited for the next year or so. This also means plans to travel South East Asia are on hold, but Sam has promised we will explore Europe and even good ole' England until we are ready and have a solid amount behind us that would ensure we would have no worries when it came to travelling and you never know we may even find a way to finally move out and get our own place together!

A part of me feels like I have failed in some way or another and when telling people my plans I feel I really have to explain myself and justify why I am doing what I've done. But what matters is being happy, and if it works for me then it works for me. It doesn't make me any less successful for going straight into it. I still completed a degree. Although I am excited I am slightly hesitant, I don't fully know what the future has instore for me right now and I am someone that loves to have some sort of plan but it's exciting to know that anything could happen in the next couple of years and I'm excited to see what that could be!

It also means pagesfrombeth won't be disappearing, again I knew if I went into teaching I'd never have time for this and it would slowly dwindle away, but now it doesn't have to and I want to work so hard and meet and talk to lots of people and have this space of the internet as a place for good maybe even great things to happen!

Have you had to make any big decisions recently? How did you feel after making them?



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Elizabeth Apps x

5 comments :

  1. Congrats on finishing uni! I also finished uni about a month ago, it's so exciting! I think it's completely normal not to be sure about what you want to do exactly after uni, we're so young! I wish you the best of luck with everything! x

    Ariadna || RAWR BOWS

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    1. Thank you lovely! I know we really are, we have so much time to fully settle down to something! Thank you, and you too! xx

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  2. Sounds like you're doing the best thing - you get to continue doing what you love whilst being able to enjoy your life and others things too! Congrats girl. You'll be fab xx

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  3. Congrats! Sounds like an exciting year coming up!

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  4. As someone who rushed into a career then completely switched direction two years later I think you are absolutely right to take the long way round 😁

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